When injustice has been served to you HOT!

Well the words that I am typing are coming out fresh in my heart. Recently we have been served some injustice by the government, which we entrusted to protect us financially. Needless to say we have not been protected, and they have allowed the wrong doer to get away with the injustice.

I have many choices laid out in front of me, and unfortunately enacted on some of these bad choices. So when I finally can cool down and get my focus back on God and what His word says I am able to find peace. Like He is our provider. He is our defender. He will REPAY ALL that the locusts have eaten. He will bring good out of this. He does not give us a spirit of fear. NO weapon formed against us shall prosper!! I will take joy in this hard time as it will build my character (hard one to swallow must admit!)

Then my mind started to ponder on the book that I'm reading by Caroline Barnett "Willing to walk on water" She and her husband Mathew Barnett run the dream center down in Los Angeles CA. She has many stories of how so many children go from foster home to foster home. She gives some disturbing facts and statistics of how the government has failed them, and has served them injustice many times over. Her amazing book is a book of hope of how WE, yes you and me can do something to help these people. The Dream Center has designed programs, they provide essential needs to these families so that they can stay together and not have to lose their children. Did you know that most foster children come from loving supporting homes? But the state removes them from their homes because the parents can't provide their children with the bare essentials. So the dream center has stepped in with donating clothing, food, diapers etc. As a result, they have been able to partner with the government to help keep families together. And fiscally they have saved the tax payers half a million dollars a year.

So when I read this book, my injustice starts to look a lot smaller. I'm sure we all have been served some injustice. Had negative words spoken over us. Been treated unfairly. etc. While reading this book, the desire to do something to help grows bigger and bigger. I didn't realize how close to home this hit. You see I'm a foster kid. Luckily I never had to stay in a foster home too long before I was rescued. I had people that loved me and got me out of there so I wouldn't end up in the system. That's all it takes. One person to perform one act of love to change someone else's world.

Now it's my responsibility to rescue others. I was rescued for a purpose. I currently submitted my application to the Little Warriors organization. I will be doing the Victor walk May 23. This walk is to bring awareness that we need to have a harsher punishment on sex offenders. I will be sharing part of my story in the production INVISIBLE which is June 14 and 15. This production's purpose is to bring awareness to women's vulnerabilites. The producer of this show is Connie Jakob who has such a heart for those who have been served injustice.

What injustice makes you angry enough to do something about it? We can't turn a blind eye anymore just  because it hurts to look at the reality of human suffering. Just because we may not see it in "our world" doesn't mean it doesn't exist. It could be just next door.

I don't want to be pissed off anymore due to the unfairness of life. So I'm transfering that energy into being proactive into helping others. Each and everyone of us have been designed for a purpose and a plan. No matter  what walk of life you have had to walk, "treating your neighbor as you would like to be treated" applies to everyone. I think life would be much simpler if we all applied more kindness into other people's lives. Pay it forward BEFORE it even gets to you.

How God is using ordinary, simple me

My desire and cry is to do extraodinary things and be a world changer. Well that sounds exciting, thrilling, and fulfilling. I would like to paint you a picture of what that looks like in my life.

I'm not going across seas to help orphans, or save babies (although someday I would love to meet our sponsor children in India and Rwanda) I'm not part of an organization that fights for social justice (which I humbly stand up and applaud all that do).

I am a stay at home mom. I have four boys that I am responsible for. My husband I will have to one day release them into the world to make a difference. To make this world a better place somehow. This quote by Andy Stanley "Your greatest contribution to the kingdom of God may not be something you do but someone you raise" really stopped me in my tracks. I have interpreted this as both biological and spiritual. Derek and I have four biological children, and we also have spiritual children,which we both feel responsible to mentor and speak life with the word of God into their lives.

I was at a girl friends house the other night having a glass of wine with her and LISTENING to her. I was able to RELATE, and offer some insight and just speak life into her situation. We both left that night feeling encouraged, and empowered.

What is my point here? I believe we start doing extraordinary things through the relationships that we have., and by making NEW relationships. Jesus's great commission in Mathew 28:16-20 ¹⁶ Then the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain where Jesus had told them to go. ¹⁷ When they saw him, they worshiped him; but some doubted. ¹⁸ Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. ¹⁹ Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

So how do we do that? I'm so glad that you asked. We as Christians need the body of Christ, we need the Church. But before we introduce people to the "building church" we need to introduce ourselves and BE the church. I know what it's like to be so consumed with church meetings, and commitments that it inhibits me to be able to get "out there". Commitments and serving the House is very important. But please let's not lose focus on what is the soul purpose of serving the house. It's about people. It's introducing people to Jesus. I want to make Jesus attractive to others. I don't believe that looks like giving the perception of  a "perfect and flawless" life. I don't believe that portraying that we as Christians have no problems or that we don't need to work through issues of our own is attractive. In fact I think that can create an opposite reaction. Instead of giving out brochures, or tracks, let's BE the brochures and tracks. Meaning be what we preach. Being real. I have days that I have to put myself on a time out for the safety of my other family members! I wear shape wear sometimes underneath my clothes. Shape wear just makes this world a better place! I have issues that I try to work through every day! I need to keep my mind right by refusing to think negative thoughts. I need to stop worrying and caring about what others think of me.

God will use the foolishness of the world to confound the wise. So if you are  a woman you will understand that talking about shape wear, messy houses, shopping, and weird bodily fluids that come out of our children can be meaningful. Do you think that having your theology perfectly right is going to win the lost? Don't get me wrong, theology is important as well as knowing the Word. However I believe that by just entering into someone else's world, and just loving them is far more effective then speaking a foreign language called "Christianese" and speaking a ramble of theology. 

How I thought God was going to use me to do extraordinary things wasn't at all what I expected. For me it's as simple as doing life with people that have come into my life, or my life into theirs. Knowing that I have impacted someones life in a positive way, by simply just being me.. well folks that to me is living an extraordinary life!

Not measuring up

I don't want to or mean to be controversial, but whenever one challenges the thinking of what we have been taught for years and years, apparently it is then controversial.

I want to talk about the lovely Proverbs 31 woman. When I was a teenager, and a young woman I would read this verse, and feel yet again the strain and pressure of being the perfect Christian, and woman. I already had been told that I had a rebellious spirit and what kind of man would want to marry me with such an unsubmissive heart. So reading this verse I yet again concluded that I simply don't measure up, and yes what kind of man would want to marry me. So at age 21 I vowed that I would NEVER marry, or have children, let alone become a Pastors wife.

From the ages of 21-23 I did just that, rebelled in every way I possibly could. I gave up. It was just too hard to be perfect. Unfortunately I had to hit rock bottom to finally see the light, or perhaps it was a shadow. I wanted to kill myself. I thought that this was the answer and way out. I was crumpled on the bathroom floor of my friends apartment, sobbing, and planning how I was going to kill myself. That's when God showed up. I literally felt Him pick me up off the floor, brush me off, and gently but firmly remind me all the people that love me and how hurtful this act would be to them. I pulled myself together, made an excuse to my friend that her cats were causing my eyes to become red and swollen and left abruptly. That's when I went on a deep journey to discover who God really is. I literally had to erase all that I had been taught, and to learn the Word of God for myself.

I rededicated myself to God. But one thing just did not sit well in my stomach. I didn't want to become a "church person". It took me many many years after and a whole paradigm shift of thinking to finally get set free from "church". Please hear me. I love Gods church as it is His Bride. But if I may be so bold to say, we His church have made many mistakes to represent Jesus. I had to be set free from all the religiosity and legalities of the "church" in order to move forward. We are human. Pastors, elders, deacons, leaders are all human and make mistakes. I can't find one person that I know that has not been hurt by the church in one way or another. So does that mean that we just give up on God's church? Absolutely not! Change, yes, but the church is not obsolete. I believe that honor is key. I honor my leaders,Pastors, as their job is not easy, and the last thing we as Christians need to do is tear down His Bride.

When I started to date my now husband, it was the happiest time of my life. So happy that I actually started to put him on a pedestal and make him my god. Derek showed me love, grace, and mercy that I hadn't known. So when we got married, and he had to work late nights, and long hours, all of a sudden this "god" of mine was disappointing me. I became very depressed and had such a distorted view of what happiness really was. It took some years to get the focus off of ME. It wasn't fair of me to put my husband on a pedestal, as the only way is down. After our second child was born, I really started a spiritual growth journey. I started to discover who God was, and that I was putting my identity and self worth in all the wrong areas. I needed to put my identity, and worth in HIM, and what He says about me in His Word. After I switched my focus onto Jesus and not ME, my life, my marriage, everything turned around. I looked at life with a whole new view and perspective.

Now back to the Proverbs 31 woman. When I fully discovered, and understood that this verse was based on the wise words of Basheba to her son Solomon in what to find in a wife, it set me free.When reading this infamous and notorious scripture verse, I believe that it is a great example to try and model our life after. However we as women tend to look at other women and measure ourselves accordingly. I know many women who have four kids and are a lot skinnier than me. I know a lot of women who have cleaner houses than me, who are more organized, better cooks, and bakers than me. Who are so creative with sewing,scrap booking, etc. Who are smarter... Well I can just make a huge list and go on and on and on. And to be honest, when I measure myself with these other women I just feel like a complete and total failure! So I had to take the long way around in life (yes a pattern that I'm fixing) and discover who I am. That I need to measure myself to what God says about ME. This is what He says about me (and you) Psalm 139:13-15 "I am fearfully, and wonderfully made" Jeremiah 29:11"I have plans for you, to prosper you, not to harm you, but give you hope for your future". These are two of my favorite verses. When I would complain about my body as a teenager, my mother would always say that over me "You are fearfully and wonderfully made". It took me many years, but I think it is beginning to sink in.

I encourage and challenge you to not measure your life with other peoples lives. Because more than you know they are probably doing the same thing and looking at you, wishing they were more like you. Be set free in knowing who you are in what God says about you. Jesus did not come from a "perfect" heritage. He has a prostitute, murderer, adulterer all in his lineage. God chose the least of the least to carry out His work. If you look in the scriptures, God never chose the most educated,most talented, best looking to represent Him. Because honestly it isn't about us, it's about God and who He is. It's about having a dream bigger than ourselves. Living a generous life. Loving people despite their faults. Loving people different from us. Forgiving and letting go of offenses QUICKLY. God never promised a life without storms, difficulties, or hardship. What He has done, and promised is that HE will never leave us nor forsake us. He is right there in the middle of the furnace with us.

When we try to measure up to anyone, or anything there is only a long road of defeat, feelings of failure, isolation, and loneliness. God is no respecter of persons. He doesn't compare you, or measure you to the next. So why should you?